I've sent in my recommendations, so you can expect a call to service any time now. Of course, the decision to enlist is absolutely up to you, but I can't encourage you more highly to join. The training is tough, but the wages are superb... life and peace and ultimately in the end there is a fantastic retirement plan... plus the enjoyment of wielding a sword and dealing a death blow to demons on their own festering turf. We have the greatest of commanders, the Lord Jesus Christ, and the greatest of weapons, the power of the Holy Spirit, that no foe either in heaven or on earth can stand up against, for we've seen even the most terrifying of giants fall, and many more will follow.
I can't pretend that the work isn't dangerous, for it will ultimately cost you your life, but at the end of it all our marching song still sings:
"Hallelujah! Salvation and glory and honor and power belongs to our God, for now and forever. Amen!"
So what'll it be?